Cry me a river...

I already knew last year that I was working at such a pace and sharing my journey on my blog pretty much started becoming more about sharing upcoming things I was involved in, as opposed to sharing my heart.  I knew I wanted to be more {vulnerable} this year.  This space for me has always been a place to process my creative endeavours.  Mainly for myself as a way of unpacking my creative struggles and celebrating small victories, mixed in with a bit of real life and the things that are precious to me.  It has always been my safe place, my refuge.  When I started my blog, I made a silent vow to never talk politics or anything negative.  My creativity is such a beautiful part of my life and I want to share that.

I feel that the world currently is not a securely held place at the best of times and it is hard not to take that all on.  This is my little corner to help me feel loved and safe in a world that doesn't always afford me the luxury of that.  Being a sensitive person, I know I feel the weight of the earth groaning and some days I am overwhelmed.  

Survival lies in sanity, and sanity lies in paying attention.
— Julia Cameron

So that all being said - let's talk about our water crisis.  Thank you for the letters and messages about our water crisis.  It's lovely to know you hold us in this.  My special online friend asked me why haven't I been sharing about our hardships and why am I only sharing how amazing life is.  I felt convicted because it touched my {vulnerability} nerve but how do I do this without touching on politics or the state of our country's affairs and how do I do that without going against what this space means to me.  I am conflicted. How do I be real and vulnerable without whining about how hard my life in Africa is, right?

I don't want to do that.


Cape Town is my beautiful home and this is where I have lived the longest.  I love where we live and on the most part I am in love with our life.  I know it could be better but this is Africa and it will never be without it's challenges.  I get that.  I don't think there is a perfect place in the world either.  I think every country has it's own unique set of problems.

Cape Town is in a water crisis due to mismanagement, lack of foresight/planning and of course, corruption.  Maybe even denial.  So what is the upside to all of this... to me the upside of crisis is always creativity and innovation.  I am already seeing how we as a family are changing the way we think about water.  I am seeing companies and concerns pulling together with innovative ideas to do better and be better.  To conserve and preserve.  I am excited and so encouraged.  I hope we will never go back to wasteful indulgent ways of using water.  When you are down to measuring every drop, it matters.

In terms of the political climate in our country, it is bad and most days I am ashamed of it and that this is our story.  But we are on the brink of big change so today I have a tiny ounce of hope again.  Rebuilding takes time and I am hoping we move into a new season.  There is enough in the news and online about our now ex-President.  Please feel free to google it.

The quality of life is in proportion, always, to the capacity for delight. The capacity for delight is the gift of paying attention.... and the reward for attention is always healing.
— Julia Cameron

So for the moment I spend time focusing on the goodness I can find in the small things around me.

I focus on the things that delight me so I can cope with it all.  So I can heal my heart that is aching deeply for the state of affairs of my second country of origin.  We fled the first when I was 5, but that's another story for another time.  The small things I find that bring me joy makes me feel, no... make me know that this life is worth living. I have so much to be grateful for.

Fear is our reality, yes because we have poverty and crime and yes, it is challenging but I am fully engaged and fully here!  From what I see on the news fear might be becoming everyone's reality.  The world is in a weird space and I've been saying for a long time, Mother Earth is groaning.

Life is beautiful.  It's not perfect, but it's enough, for now. 

I get to come home after a full day in the city, which I love, to my sweet little home and beautiful studio that I am so grateful to have and I get to try find and make beautiful everyday and just for a precious moment I get to forget the woes of the world and get to focus on goodness.

And then I get to share that with you.  Thank you for giving me that.